Author: Team Amrita Yoga, Amritapuri
Summary: In a recent session, Amma discussed the concept of Maya, defining it not as nonexistence but as the ever-changing nature of reality. She explained that suffering arises from clinging to impermanent things and from preconceived expectations of love and happiness. Real love is obstructed by ego, leading us to misuse relationships to satisfy our desires rather than genuinely connecting with others. Amma emphasized that true happiness and love originate from within, not from external sources. By shifting our focus from expecting to giving, and recognizing the inherent nature of things and people, we can transcend sorrow and find inner peace and joy. This wisdom, illustrated with everyday examples, invites us to embrace life’s changes with a sense of acceptance and to find strength and bliss within ourselves.
In a question-and-answer session in Amritapuri this week, Amma was asked, “Maya is often defined as the illusory nature of the world. What is Maya or illusion and why is it so difficult to overcome? I have been doing spiritual practices for many years and I am still under Maya. In this world, everyone is craving for love. What is the relationship between Maya and love?”
Maya doesn’t mean nonexistent. Rather it means ever-changing. For example, in a blossomed flower, you enjoy the beauty and fragrance of the flower. But by evening it withers. With this understanding of impermanence, you enjoy the flower and not cry. Maya doesn’t mean that the flower never existed; it means that everything is in a constant state of change.
When we move through life with preconceived notions, we will experience sorrow. To think that a certain person will love you or give you what you want will make you miserable. If we depend on what is changing, sorrow is the inevitable result. This is the true definition of Maya.
When you love something that is simply not there in people, you will experience sorrow. That is Maya. At present we do not have the capacity to really love other human beings because of our ego. We are using them. We want them to be tuned to ourselves, but we will not tune ourselves to them. Thus, the ego and the attitude of ‘I’ blocks the flow of real love. That’s why we love cats and dogs so much — they respond to our love and obey our commands. It is the ego that is the very foundation of Maya.
Believing that happiness can be found in other people or outside of ourselves, we will not be able to cross over this Maya. A marriage becomes like two beggars begging from each other. When no one is there to give love, how will you receive love? Each expects to receive from the other, and neither is there to give – two blind beggars trying to lead each other, stumbling, and getting nowhere.
Our love comes with expectation. The owner who loves his racehorse so much may shoot it if it breaks its leg. The cow that stops giving milk is sent to the butcher. Such is the nature of worldly love.
A stray dog chews a bone until its gums bleed. The dog enjoys the taste of blood, thinking it comes from the bone. Finally, the dog loses consciousness from loss of blood. We think we will find bliss from the objects of the senses, but closer examination reveals that the source of bliss is always and only found within ourselves. Our focus is on the outside and hence we are unable to overcome Maya.
To depend on others for love and happiness is to expect something that simply doesn’t exist. We must awaken our own love from within. Not by seeking it outside, but by giving will we find love.
“We should try to see everything in its place then sorrow will cease. For example, we should see an elephant as an elephant and a frog as a frog. We should see a nurse as a nurse and a doctor as a doctor. We should not expect the nurse to behave like a doctor or expect the doctor to behave like a nurse. We should not expect a dog to behave like a cat or vice versa. Both sugar and salt are white, and yet we do not expect sugar to taste like salt and vice versa.
“For example, let’s say that you need to borrow some money, so you approach a childhood friend and ask to borrow Rs. 1,000. This friend had earlier told you, ‘Come to me anytime you need anything. I am so wealthy – I can help you in your time of need.’ Now, when you approach him, the truth may be different. He may tell you, ‘In fact, I wanted to come see you. I myself need some money urgently. Can you give me Rs. 10,000?’ Or he may say that he can loan you money, but he can only afford to loan you half of what you asked for. He might even offer you much more than you asked for – say Rs. 5,000.
Expectation brings sorrow. When we don’t get what we expected, we feel sad. It is our foolish expectation that causes our sorrow. This sadness gives way to anger, which leads finally to depression. But it all starts with expectation. Instead of receiving, start thinking about giving. Don’t search for happiness outside yourself. There is an inexhaustible resource of happiness within. We are not candles lit by others, but the self-effulgent sun. We are not crying kittens, but roaring lions.
Sri Krishna’s life was a life of laughter. When Gandhari cursed him, Lord Krishna accepted it with a smile, saying, “I knew this would happen!” Understanding spirituality is like being an accomplished swimmer in the ocean – the swimmer enjoys the mighty waves. When you have this knowledge, you will be able to move through life with an equanimous mind.
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